Falling Out Of Love
Leaving a cosy relationship for the great unknown world of singledom is terrifying but if you’ve reached the inevitable conclusion that you can’t love your partner anymore, you need to be honest.
You love your partner but you’re not in love with them. How do you end a relationship where your partner has become more of a brother/sister than a lover?
There are many reasons why relationships end, but falling out of love with a kind, generous, loving partner can be the most heart-breaking and baffling situation. How can the idea of having sex with your partner suddenly seem so awful when you still love them as a person? Why do you feel a surge of anger when they offer to take you out for dinner or clean the bathroom? When your head is arguing with your heart it’s difficult to know in which direction to go. Admitting to yourself for no obvious, rational reason, that you don’t love your partner, is tough.
It's Tough and no easy way of saying it
Telling someone that you don’t feel the same about them as you once did is even tougher and in truth there’s no easy way of saying it. When your heart says one thing and your head another, it’s difficult to define, and even more difficult to articulate to someone you care so much for. Firstly, it is important to get things straight in your head before you make any final decisions. Coming to that choice can be a long, lonely road, but acting rashly – or not acting at all – can only increase the heartache.
Leaving a cosy relationship for the great unknown world of singledom is terrifying but if you’ve reached the inevitable conclusion that you can’t love this person anymore, you need to ‘fess up – and leave. Don’t prolong the agony. Breaking up with your partner might break their heart, but it’s better than sentencing them to a life with someone who can’t love them in a way that they deserve to be loved. Don’t look for permission to leave the relationship – they are not going to give you that – or start finding problems where there aren’t any. Remember that this is more about how you’re feeling than anything your partner has done, so be honest.
Nightingale Couple Counsellors
Counselling can be hugely beneficial in these situations, even if it’s just to help you acknowledge your feelings. Falling out of love with someone is a confusing time; you don’t want to play the baddie, but you don’t want to be stuck in a relationship with a partner you don’t think you’re in love with.
Counselling can also help a couple work through their couple circumstances with regards to children and family and how to manage the situation. Counselling will ask some powerful questions that can help a couple gain a better perspective of issues around the relationship which can sometimes shift the situation. It is only fair to the partner who wants the relationship to continue to be given the opportunity to share their side of the story and their experience of the relationship.
Edited work of Suzanne Elliott
I was first introduced to Nightingale Counselling when my marriage was coming to an end. I found our counselling sessions to be a real revelation and learned so much about myself and about what makes relationships tick. I would recommend Florence to anyone who was experiencing relationship difficulties.
Online Counselling
Providing you with the tools you need to take the next step.
Technology is rapidly changing the ways we can interact with each other, and counselling is no exception. This
service can be provided upon request. For the below options you will need broadband/internet connection and
somewhere quiet and private you can speak without being overheard or interrupted. Your Counsellor will agree with
you what happens should the technology fail, but in all other respects the counselling relationship will be the same
as a ‘face to face’ one. The Counsellor will speak to you from a private room …
0141 353 9373
Mon-Fri 08.00 – 21.00
Sat 09.00 – 17.00
(out of hours at discretion of Counsellor)
5 La Belle Place,
Glasgow, G3 7LH
The Prince & Princess of Wales Hospice,
20 Dumbreck Rd,
Glasgow, G41 5BW